Post by Erik Sanferd on Aug 12, 2010 22:26:44 GMT -5
Erik Sanferd here...coming to you from the back pages of one of the windsurfing publications...perhaps you are familiar. I am a creative writer...in my own mind, and now I write for you.
Affairs of the heart are so simple to to write about, yet they are not so simple in the way they go down, especially when they include a windsurfer that many of us know.
1footwilly.
I am writing of a love affair spanning multiple continents and time zones, of runways, foreign warehouses, and back room deals. I write about a smitten average Joe and a Dutch Hawaiian Supermodel on a fateful collision course on the runways of Rochester NY, and still bound for the bedroom of an unassuming Honeoye Falls (a town who's only previous excitement was a sprout farmer mowing his lawn in his drawers just to piss off the neighbors) man. I don't mean to blow the cover of this relationship gossip magazine style but, oh wait...yes I do.
No doubt this relationship began on the internet, simple enough. A foreign supermodel/bombshell bride with a flashy photo looking to find the right match, and U.S. citizenship, in the work hardened hands of a 9-5 working (aside from windy days) average Joe. Even the most disciplined web surfer could not have resisted following the curvy and tempting banner add on Iwindsurf to find out more...to see what they might be missing... the featured photo sure was a supermodel. Whats more 1footwilly had been reading about this Japanese street bike of a supermodel for months....I have to imagine that reading other people's high opinion of her made him bite. Or maybe it was the pic of her frolicking in the waters of the far off windsurfing dreamland....Hawaii. Even more, it seemed that all who had laid eyes on her commented on how accessible she made the fast life (for the average Joe/windsurfer) yet still could maneuver her way around the undulating waves of a Dutch rave dance floor in full swing.
To protect the foreign super model's identity I will refer to her only by her last name "Thommen".
Oh how 1footwilly chased Thommen........She seemed elusive and hard to pin down, at once appearing available in the U.S., but then unavailable and only rumored to have appeared in Holland (which of course is now known as The Netherlands, and is the home of a refreshing globally exported beer in a green bottle).
1footwilly spent many a days practicing his Dutch while drinking a Heineken (or six) and listening to foreign language instruction tapes. Thommen became to object of his obsession and he would stop at nothing to make her his.
A little background on Thommen....she is turny, accessible to all, easy to dial in, she is as exotic as bamboo wood. Her home is on Maui yet she is in high demand in her fathers homeland of The Netherlands. She can make the man that possess her a king, and make all others bow down to her power.
Anyhow, 1footwilly's labor of love began to solidify when Thommen was found in a warehouse in Holland. Her 117 liter frame was pinned after tiresome chasing, and she would be the prize of 1footwilly. After settling on an undisclosed price with her handlers, she was shipped at once with little more than some accessories, a bag and perhaps a piece of paper detailing her pedigree. This BEAUTIFUL FOREIGN SUPERMODEL would be 1footwilly's after all.
The details are fuzzy, and nobody outside of ole 1foot himself has laid eyes on this foreign beauty. While she has no doubt paraded on fashion runways worldwide, this supermodel negotiated her last runway in Rochester NY. Sources not wanting to be named due to the sensitive nature of the topic, confirm that she was united with 1footwilly early Wednesday morning and was quickly spirited away to Honeoye Falls to possibly never see the light of day again. Why? You see it seems that 1footwilly is afraid that his supermodel may also be a china doll and that his paranoia of losing her (or being inadequate) or somehow damaging her may keep her from being seen in the public eye ever again. Time will tell. He holds such a tight leash on her that she is rumored to be holed up in a special coat/bag, custom made for her, in 1footwilly's house.
Please 1footwilly.....please bring the supermodel forth so that we may all lay eyes on her sultry curves.
The End.....for now.
Note to reader: You have hopefully figured out that the supermodel is an exotic Thommen windsurfer, 1footwilly is our old friend Windkid's new screen name, and that the author has not had enough sleep or water time in a long time.
And who is the true author?
?
Affairs of the heart are so simple to to write about, yet they are not so simple in the way they go down, especially when they include a windsurfer that many of us know.
1footwilly.
I am writing of a love affair spanning multiple continents and time zones, of runways, foreign warehouses, and back room deals. I write about a smitten average Joe and a Dutch Hawaiian Supermodel on a fateful collision course on the runways of Rochester NY, and still bound for the bedroom of an unassuming Honeoye Falls (a town who's only previous excitement was a sprout farmer mowing his lawn in his drawers just to piss off the neighbors) man. I don't mean to blow the cover of this relationship gossip magazine style but, oh wait...yes I do.
No doubt this relationship began on the internet, simple enough. A foreign supermodel/bombshell bride with a flashy photo looking to find the right match, and U.S. citizenship, in the work hardened hands of a 9-5 working (aside from windy days) average Joe. Even the most disciplined web surfer could not have resisted following the curvy and tempting banner add on Iwindsurf to find out more...to see what they might be missing... the featured photo sure was a supermodel. Whats more 1footwilly had been reading about this Japanese street bike of a supermodel for months....I have to imagine that reading other people's high opinion of her made him bite. Or maybe it was the pic of her frolicking in the waters of the far off windsurfing dreamland....Hawaii. Even more, it seemed that all who had laid eyes on her commented on how accessible she made the fast life (for the average Joe/windsurfer) yet still could maneuver her way around the undulating waves of a Dutch rave dance floor in full swing.
To protect the foreign super model's identity I will refer to her only by her last name "Thommen".
Oh how 1footwilly chased Thommen........She seemed elusive and hard to pin down, at once appearing available in the U.S., but then unavailable and only rumored to have appeared in Holland (which of course is now known as The Netherlands, and is the home of a refreshing globally exported beer in a green bottle).
1footwilly spent many a days practicing his Dutch while drinking a Heineken (or six) and listening to foreign language instruction tapes. Thommen became to object of his obsession and he would stop at nothing to make her his.
A little background on Thommen....she is turny, accessible to all, easy to dial in, she is as exotic as bamboo wood. Her home is on Maui yet she is in high demand in her fathers homeland of The Netherlands. She can make the man that possess her a king, and make all others bow down to her power.
Anyhow, 1footwilly's labor of love began to solidify when Thommen was found in a warehouse in Holland. Her 117 liter frame was pinned after tiresome chasing, and she would be the prize of 1footwilly. After settling on an undisclosed price with her handlers, she was shipped at once with little more than some accessories, a bag and perhaps a piece of paper detailing her pedigree. This BEAUTIFUL FOREIGN SUPERMODEL would be 1footwilly's after all.
The details are fuzzy, and nobody outside of ole 1foot himself has laid eyes on this foreign beauty. While she has no doubt paraded on fashion runways worldwide, this supermodel negotiated her last runway in Rochester NY. Sources not wanting to be named due to the sensitive nature of the topic, confirm that she was united with 1footwilly early Wednesday morning and was quickly spirited away to Honeoye Falls to possibly never see the light of day again. Why? You see it seems that 1footwilly is afraid that his supermodel may also be a china doll and that his paranoia of losing her (or being inadequate) or somehow damaging her may keep her from being seen in the public eye ever again. Time will tell. He holds such a tight leash on her that she is rumored to be holed up in a special coat/bag, custom made for her, in 1footwilly's house.
Please 1footwilly.....please bring the supermodel forth so that we may all lay eyes on her sultry curves.
The End.....for now.
Note to reader: You have hopefully figured out that the supermodel is an exotic Thommen windsurfer, 1footwilly is our old friend Windkid's new screen name, and that the author has not had enough sleep or water time in a long time.
And who is the true author?
?